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Coleslaw For Everybody

FOX (Christopher Walken): We had a good day.

X (Willem Dafoe): Yeah, we did.

FOX: I wrote a haiku, you know, for the occasion. A dog… walks into a bar. He’s wearing a suit, shirt, and tie. He says to the bartender, “I’d like a Scotch… and toilet water.”

(they both crack up)

FOX: It’s a haiku. Rapid translated. You know, on another more serious note. Sandii and Hiroshi were seen having dinner… in a hotel, two nights ago. “Very cozy,” that’s the description I got. There was chitchat. They’re telling jokes. Also her room was not slept in that night… according to a cleaning lady. Looks like you’re not the only one.

X: I suppose that’s good. You know… business is business. Just because he’s fucking her, doesn’t mean he’s gonna put her on back of his horse and ride out of town.

FOX: Yeah, but we bet a million dollars that our horse comes in first. There’s no place to show in this race. That’s the way I love it. Also-rans make me puke.

X: They’re gonna come after us and you know that.

FOX: I’ve been hunted my whole life. It’s all I know. Me against them, from the beginning. What do I care? They break my back, I’d break their back. I’m a hunter too. It’s the one I believed… that the Edge was felt. Some of what Hiroshi feels, he’s… He looks different. He’s like us.

X: So… if this happens, will that do it for you? Will you find redemption? Will you finally have the Edge, or whatever you call that pie-shape wedge that missing from your psyche and deny you from feeling complete.

FOX: Yes, it’s what the prospect is about making up a million dollars. That’s the deal. Thanks goodness I didn’t ask for two. Psyche? This thing is for idlers and dreamers. Introspection? Where does this come from? It doesn’t fit… behoove… a gentleman to be introspective.

X: I’m with you.

FOX: Good. Now that the heart-filled conversation is out of the way… could we talk about money? I want you to fly to Marrakesh. It’s no point in dilly-dallying. I want to guy know there’s a lab to go to.

X: I’ll take care of it.

FOX: Give him anything he wants; make the guy happy. This is it. He has the girl. He’s rid of the ball-busters. What a guy, he’s like…

X: You envy him, don’t you?

FOX: I do.

X: You love him, don’t you?

FOX: I would love it to be like that, to be so free, to be so rich, so famous. You know, the guy’s… he’s got everything. What you would give to a man who has everything? Sandii. It’s a terrible name. I mean, is she from Staten Island? Is her father in construction? She has two sisters? Teri and Tina?

X: Candy.

(they both crack up again)

FOX: Hey, banzai!

X: Banzai.

FOX: Waiter! Coleslaw for everybody! Too bad nobody’s here.

New Rose Hotel, directed by Abel Ferrara, written by Zois & Ferrara based on a short story by William Gibson

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